This post is a little tongue in cheek. I was supposed to be going away for an amazing 4 month holiday in Europe. There was going to be sun. There was going to be sand. There was going to be breathtaking historical sites. It was going to be amazing. I’d been dreaming of this since I was a kid!

There are currently a lot of blogs out there with “10 steps to still feel great during covid!” including recycled tips such as “make sure you have a schedule!” “work out!” “Read a book!”. Sometimes they will have a unique tip like “try reading a genre you don’t normally” but not tooooo often.

So I thought instead of doing a “six tips I saw online and now I’ve amalgated into a list of things I don’t do but I’d recommend to others!” I’d take my salty I’m not going on holiday anymore attitude, and make a fun post about. So without further adue, here are five not that funny but it’s my type of humor tips to help you still have fun at home, after covid ruined it for you.

1. If you were supposed to be going on a summer vacay, and it’s winter in your home town. Just use your “summer” shade of foundation

And the opposite if you were coming to the Southern Hemisphere!

Seem ridiculous, I know! But how else would you get a beautiful sun-kissed glow from Croatia or Greece, while staying in your cold, wintery country? Pair with a turtle neck so no one can see how pasty you actually are. Add some sun glasses, maybe a little (or a lot) of bronzer, and voila! Summer kissed skin without leaving winter.

Alternatively, fake tan until you’re an amazing shade of orange, and freeze your booty off in whatever clothes you had pegged to take on your vacay.

2. Hire a car! Drive around like a tourist!

So heres the situation: You’ve saved a lot of money to go on your once in a life time vacay. Now it’s just sitting there in your bank, begging to be spent! Don’t save it! Use it!

Maybe hire a car! Maybe a massive 4×4? Maybe a small eco car! Perhaps buy a cheap van that’ll break down every 100km. Just something that’s not the same as your every day vehicle so you can take it on a tiki-tour and explore your town / region like a tourist. Drive super slow. Drive in the over-taking lane. Don’t indicate! Drive slowly past signs which may or may not be your destination! It doesn’t matter! The car isn’t registered in your name! This isn’t your country!… Oh wait.

(PS please drive safely)

3. Put a hammock up outside and let the howling wind rock you to sleep

Don’t worry about getting wet. You’d be getting wet at a beach somewhere in Europe, the only difference is this water is rain. Directly from the sky. You can also invest in a water proof Kobo or Kindle and read a book outside, on your hammock, in a raging storm! Ahhh peace.

This is legit the only relevant photo I could find on Unsplash. Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
4. Get totally wasted on summer cocktails, but in the comfort of your own home

Now look, I’m not a huge drinker, especially when we travel because it’s just expensive. However if I’m not going away, I now have a lot of money to spend, and what better way to spend it then on booze, and getting totally wasted in your own home? You don’t have to worry about sleezy people taking advantage of tourists, plus you learn a new skill!! My fav “summer” cocktail is defo sex on the beach but you can’t go past a Mojito!

If you paired your cocktail with togs, and went out to your hammock from tip 3, you really could have a party! Photo by Joshua Rawson-Harris on Unsplash
5. Spend a shit ton of money on stuff you don’t need

Bonus if you can order summer things so it’ll arrive when summer does! Maybe a pool you can wack up in your backyard. Some of those blow up unicorns for said swimming pool. A cute bikini you saw online that certainty won’t fit your top half, but you’re hopeful anyway.

You could buy a cocktail set from Amazon to WOW your friends next time you see them in person! Perhaps buy you dream car (but in toy format because we actually do want to save a bit of money!). Spend $200 on “planning” note books and stickers etc to plan for that really busy schedule you’re sure to have after COVID is over.

But seriously…

Let’s look at these tips and take a serious spin on them

  1. Right now is the perfect time to play with makeup if you’re so inclined! So then you can get that perfect “no makeup / makeup” look for your photos when you’re on tour! (I don’t wear makeup on holiday, but I’ve started to at work! so I’ve been playing with suitable looks)
  2. It’s also a perfect time to travel your own country. You could make a week of it with your friends and/or family. Tourism outlets will be happy for the business and you never know what you might stumble across in your own backyard!
  3. Don’t actually set up a hammock in the rain (I mean, unless that sounds amazing to you!). You could maybe fine a quiet spot in your home (which isn’t your bed or office) to read a nice book. Or not. You do you.
  4. Get wasted. Or not. Everyone has their preferences. I started drinking a bit of gin during NZ lockdown. No reason, I just like it. Just be safe!
  5. Putting a strain on places like Amazon is probably not ideal – America is… well America is busy right now. Try local! It might be a bit more expensive, but your local economy will need it soon, if not already. Otherwise, just save what you can for that next big trip.

Right now, I am reading a lot of blogs to see places I’d love to go when this is all over. For example, I wasn’t planning on spending much time in the UK at all on our trip, except for Harry Potter world, however now I want to head to Edinburgh to follow the Harry Potter Trail, and someone really has me sold on Iceland now! (convincing Jared – who hates the cold – is another story!)

What are some silly tips you’ve thought of over this time? The more ridiculous the better!

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2 Comments

Jian · June 1, 2020 at 9:27 am

This was a really fun read! I’ve definitely been trying to go for walks to explore my city better since quarantine started.

amymayj · June 25, 2020 at 12:43 pm

While I haven’t really travelled much around my hometown I’ve certainly been loving my half hour drives to my Mum’s house over the last few weeks – having the windows down and the music playing definitely gets me feeling summery! x

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